son of a...that's gonna leave a mark.

I'm slowly making my way back to the land of the living. I made some coffee and ate some toast, and I am watching Fox News.

My sinuses are killing me, which is making my throat feel like I swallowed razor blades. I am seriously considering having my head removed, a transplant maybe? I request whiter teeth and better skin please.

Last night I watched a lot of crappy stuff on TV. First, the Dewey Cox movie thanks to Netflix. Yeah, I guess it was funny, but overall I was not that impressed. With the exception of a few good lines like "This was particularly a bad case of someone being cut in half," I was a little bored. The whole Beatles thing was putting me to sleep. I have a sneaking suspicion that I would like it more if I wasn't half dead, but I doubt I will ever watch it again.

Ok then after the movie, we see "Celebrity Circus" on the guide. Ummm who could NOT watch that? Not me. First of all, I love their idea of "celebrities" but I guess they couldn't really call it "People you may have seen before, maybe not, but at some point they were possibly a big deal Circus"

Wee Man, Rachel Hunter, the girl who played Dionne on Clueless, Peter Brady, some Olympic swimmer, and some girl who had a one hit wonder circa 2002-2003. If there were any other "celebrities" I forgot.

What I think, is that instead of the Celebrity Circus show, a much more entertaining show would be the casting process of this show. I would love to be a fly on the wall and hear the phone calls between the agents and the producers.

Producer: Hi, we're calling to see if Ms. Diaz would be interested in starring in Celebrity Circus on NBC.
Agent: (Laugh) Click.

Producer: Hi, we're calling to see if Mr. Kutcher would be interested in starring in Celebrity Circus on NBC.
Agent: Click. Who let this call through? You're fired.

Producer: Hi, we're calling to see if Ms. Spears would be interested in starring in Celebrity Circus on NBC.
Agent: Hang on. . . .
Agent: Ok, she wants to know if she can ride the elephant.
Producer: Um. I don't think we're going to have any animals. We were thinking more along the lines of walking the tightrope or trapeze.
Agent: Hang on. . . .
Agent: Ok, she's in.
Producer: Really? Wow, ok, I wasn't expecting that. You know, let me call you back. No, really...it's ok. We'll be in touch.

Six thousand calls later....

Producer: Hi, we're calling to see if that girl who was in Clueless would be interested in starring in Celebrity Circus on NBC.
Agent: Alicia Silverstone?
Producer: No, um, she's not available. We already called her.
Agent: Brittany Murphy?
Producer: No...
Agent: Oh! "Dionne", I forgot about her. Yeah, lemme see if I still have her number.
Agent: Ok, she wants to know who else has signed on.
Producer: Well, let's see. I think we have a definite yes from the little person that was on Jackass. Oh, and Rachel Hunter.
Agent: Who?
Producer: You know, she was married to Rod Stewart, like a couple of decades ago.
Agent: Oh yeah. Ok. Who else?
Producer: Well, I'm not supposed to say, but our secret weapon, Christopher Knight.
Agent: Who?
Producer: Peter Brady.
Agent: Holy shit! Really? Ok, she's in.